Ad Meliora "towards better things"

  I just love when I can be of help to someone else who was standing where I was years ago.  Knowing there's something wrong with your child but not having a word other than "painfully shy" but your gut tells you, there's got to be something more to it than that.  When I got those first few words "pragmatic speech" talking to the girls first speech therapist, I couldn't get home fast enough to Google search them.  It finally gave me a direction. 

We're hoping to move soon.  I've been networking with moms in our new local area and I connected with another mom on a social media forum.  Something provoked her after reading those couple of words "Selective Mutism" to do a Google search and came upon a resounding certainty her child has SM too.   She sent me a message and asked, "Now what do I do?  Where do I go from here?" 

 I wrote back to her and said,

First let me tell you there's hope!  Lots of it.  I would say start with your primary care MD and get a referral to see a child psychologist who specializes in Selective Mustism. 
I'd start with www.Selectivemutism.org  There is a lot of information on there.  If there's no one available in your state, try to find a psychologist who is good at treating anxiety disorders, especially social anxieties.  Kids need cognitive behavioral therapy to start working a "fear hierarchy ladder."  CBT will help them mimic movements first and then works up to blowing air and taking another step to making sounds like "P" or "B" at first and then working on yes or no and so on.   SM kids are usually perfectionists   (My one is moreso than the other but we'll work on OCD issues later.)    Approach is the key with helping these kids.  You HAVE to know this condition isn't something of their choosing.  They don't choose to remain silent and it's not that they're shy and will grow out of it.  They won't, they'll only retreat further into themselves if left untreated!  If caught early enough this condition is completely reversible.  I've heard so many positive stories and tho my two still don't spontaneously speak they've made huge strides since preschool. 
As someone had shared with me in an earlier post she suggested making the kids do "hand overs" to help instigate initializing spontaneous speech.  Since I've read that suggestion, we've been doing it every chance we can get.  At first they didn't want anything to do with handing over their candy bar or gum to the cashier or their books to the librarian.  Since doing so, they've gotten less and less hesitant.  Body language in these kids shout moreso than being vocal.  Like I told the new mom I met today.  It's a long road, but persistence will in the end pay off.  Stay consistent, be gentle and understanding but firm. 
I took the kids out for hot chocolate and a doughnut last Saturday (it was a reward for them for doing their chores and earning "be brave" cards.)  They were able to with me helping them (I ask them multiple choice questions and then they answer having them look at the person behind the counter) order their own doughnut.  Last summer when we went out with the Dr. to the same place for the first time it took them almost 45 mins before they could order.  We were in and out last Sat in under 45 mins.  That's what I call progress! 

God bless the souls who's hearts are stirred and head out in a direction for our children.  That's what being a parent is about isn't it?  Moving Heaven and Earth.  With God's guidance, start right here on Earth moving one rock at a time.